The Mercy of the Morning

Beep. Beeep. Beep.
The dreaded noise,
Buzzing on my nightstand,
Awakens my heart with
The sound of warning,
Anxiety is my beginning.

Head throbbing I move
To the sink to fill
The pot and filter,
A balm,
Nowhere to be found.

My head tossing like the waves
This day is already
More than I desire.

Racing down, down
In shoes that do not fit.
My feet beating
This path before me, short
But seemingly long.

Anxious is my wait,
Certain though my hope,
At this place,
Of glory and beauty and majesty
And death and power.
But does death have power?
(For I feel it’s hold in my heart)
Something greater must
Work all for good for me.
. . . Surely it will come.

The constant crashing numbs
Mind, heart, sight
To the pain and the beauty.
A shell.

Perhaps the dead tree is
As glorious as the others,
It’s purpose served,
Its day complete,
It’s suffering ended.
The beating of the wind
No longer mis-shaping it.

The living are mis-shapen.
Redeemed?
I see not how.

To live on a promise,
A unseen certainty,
My brow furrows,
When will it come?
In the moment despair
Held tightly to my heart,
Numbness and anxiety,
Anxiety and numbness.
Do I see pink?
Throbbing heart
And head.

I step closer.
Driftwood,
Forms a seat,
Hipster but sore.

A ray beams in previously
Empty space.
Is it here?
The glory that you know
But cannot see,
How certain is our hope?

Over the water
Bursts a light,
New mercy,
Constant mercy,
A hope and promise of
Future hope and mercy
And goodness.

To gaze upon this beauty,
Morning after morning,
Balms the heart,
To keep it for the day of promise.

The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
His mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness. “
The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,
“therefore I will hope in him.”

The LORD is good to those who wait for him,
to the soul who seeks him.
It is good that one should wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

– Lamentations 3:22-26, ESV